Its Really Something, How Fast I Became Nothing
by alittlelambfan
Summary: Rachel writes to Quinn after the car crash. This sparks something in Quinn, making her want to be a better person. So she sets out to fix the ruins that are her relationships. Along the way a very special Rachel Berry helps comes into her life.


**Title:** It's Really Something How Fast I Became Nothing

**Summary:** Rachel writes to Quinn after the car crash, when Quinn is in the hospital. This sparks something in Quinn, making her want to be a better person. So she sets out to fix the ruins that are her relationships. Along the way a very special Rachel Berry helps her out.

**Notes:** **_ATTENTION!_** So to be completely honest, in order to continue this story, I need you guys to tell me to. I don't know how I feel about it. But I am willing to continue if you guys want me too!

**Pairing:** Rachel/Quinn friendship (maybe it will turn into something more)

**Warning:** Nothing this chapter I don't think

**Disclaimer: **I obviously don't own Glee or anything of its characters. They all belong to Ryan Murphy and the other wonderful people who work on the show!

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><p><em>February 20, 2012<em>

_Dear Quinn,_

_You got hit by a truck. Two days ago a bad driver who wasn't paying any attention crashed into you. Although, you probably realize that. The doctor told Mr. Shuester that you woke up yesterday. So I wanted to write to you._

_The funny part is. It's my entire fault. I am the blame for your accident, I shouldn't have been texting you, I figured you were driving and I don't know why I thought my yelling at you to get to the wedding faster would actually work. You said you were on your way and I believed you, but there was a little part of me that doubted you. I shouldn't of; it was naïve of me to think that you would be so mean to me again. And that was the little part of me that was texting you, reminding you in vain about the commitment that you weren't going to commit too. But you were committing to it, you were in your car on your way to my wedding, even thought you didn't want too. You even told me that you were on your way, but I was being selfish. If I had just trusted you a little bit more, I wouldn't have texted you, you wouldn't have looked at your phone, and you wouldn't have crashed._

_You see, it's my fault, because I didn't believe in you. I didn't believe that you were fully honest with me, that you were ready to create a friendship. I doubted you when I shouldn't of. It's my fault, because I never saw you as the victim. I was selfish. I thought you were the bully, when it was me. I don't want to marry Finn. I'm sorry it had to take you getting so hurt for me to realize that. I didn't listen to you when you said it was a bad idea to say yes to the proposal. It makes me the bully because honestly, I thought you wanted him to yourself. I thought so little of you because I was too selfish to just forgive you. I realize just how amazing of a person you are. You're not a bully. All along, you were the one that was there for me. Who cared about my future, sometimes you seem like the only one. That's ironic, but it just shows how truly beautiful you are on the inside._

_You forgave all my mistakes; I should have forgiven you earlier. For freshman and sophomore year, I should have forgiven you. Those years mean nothing to me, because they were nothing. But it was me, choosing not to forgive you, is the thing that should go unforgiven. I have no right to tell you now that I forgive you, but I do. If you could only forgive me, for being the bully all these years, it would be my pleasure to show how sorry I truly am. If you give me a chance that is, and honestly, you shouldn't. But, if you can forgive me again just one last time I swear you'll never have to again, because I will never hurt you again, not emotionally or physically._

_I just have one more selfish thing to ask. Get better. Please. I can't imagine what Glee, hell, what my life would be like without you. It's weird that you had to get into an awful car crash for me to realize how important you are to me. When the police called Santana, she started crying before she told us what was wrong. When she did, I broke down, even though I didn't really have that much of a right too. Santana, Brittany, Puck, Finn, Mercedes, they all did, but not me. It's really something, how fast I became nothing. When they told me how bad your condition was, there was a piece of me that felt missing, it confuses me sometimes, because we were really never that close. But I want you to know something. You're too much of a good person, you live to beautiful of a life to not get better. If you don't want to do it for me, than do it for the rest of the Glee Club. Most importantly, do it for yourself. You deserve to live, to go to Yale, practice your beautiful singing voice, graduate at the top of your class, and be something better than the rest of us. I know you can do it. And if you're looking for an extra friend along the way, I'm here. One hundred percent, here._

_Please Feel Better,_

_Rachel._

_P.S. You probably looked really beautiful in the bridesmaid dress._

Quinn was shaking slightly when she finished reading the letter. She ran her fingers over the paper, there were dried water marks in some places, Rachel must have been crying when she wrote it. The blonde also noticed the wet tear marks that littered the page, from her own eyes. Rachel had written the letter that same day, she probably sealed the envelope as she was walking through the hospital doors, why a nurse had to deliver it frustrated Quinn to no ened. She longed for her phone so she talk to Rachel. She wanted to tell her that none of this was her fault. That _she _was the bully. She wanted to embellish the point Rachel made that her future mattered to her. Because it did. Rachel was too talented to be caged in by marriage. She wanted to thank Rachel for the complements she gave her. And give them back. She wanted to tell Rachel that she wanted to be her friend, a good friend, to make up for all the times that she was a bully to the brunette. And, Quinn wanted more than anything to tell her that she forgave her, that she didn't _have _to forgive her because Rachel didn't do anything wrong.

Her phone was in pieces, isolated away in a plastic evidence bag somewhere else. Her heart was in pieces too, broken in some places, sowed together poorly in others, missing pieces left holes. At least that's how she felt. She had done so much thinking since she woke up in the hospital bed one day ago. And, to feel better she wanted to fix her relationships. Apologize to those she hurt, let people in. Maybe she could fill the voids in her heart if she filled the voids in others. Her mission was to be a better person. She was starting with Rachel.

"Nurse?" she called at a practitioner passing her room. The woman walked into her room with a smile, picking up Quinn's chart at the end of the hospital bed and beginning to study it, maybe looking for an answer to the blonde's unasked question.

"How can I help you?" She asked with furrowed eyebrows.

"Its not about my health actually," Quinn explained.

"Oh," the nurse said. "Then what is it?"

"Is it possible for me to send out a letter? Do you know where there would be paper and a pencil I could borrow?"

"Of course! I'll be right back," the woman said. Quinn gave her a smile and she left. The blonde looked down sadly to the letter, and then clutched it tightly to her chest, thinking ironically, how it was really something, how quickly Rachel's letter made her feel like she was nothing. But not necessarily in a bad way.

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><p><strong><em><span>REVIEW!<span>_** Reviews are very much appreciated :). Thanks guys :).


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